Fly the Funny Skies

Insider received the following communique from a former colleague who went to this year's Super Bowl. Before the start of our long-delayed post-Super Bowl flight out of logjammed San Diego Airport, the on-board attendants for the flight decided to lighten the mood by weaving a few jokes into their pre-takeoff spiel on seatbelts, oxygen masks and such. "This is a nonsmoking and a nonwhining flight," announced Michael, the lead flight attendant and top banana. "Anyone who feels the need to either smoke or whine during this flight should feel free to step outside the aircraft at any time." Michael offered some other gems, too. During the oxygen mask demonstration: "If you're traveling with a child or anyone acting like one, first place the mask on that person and then place one on yourself." During the baggage-stowing process: "Please keep in mind that your emotional baggage should be stored completely under the seat in front of you."