Movie madness

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This great nation's ongoing quest to rearrange itself into more and more ridiculous configurations has reached a new high: Parents Against Violent Airline Entertainment is a recently formed bunch of concerned citizens from Connecticut who want to dictate which movies are shown on airplanes.

Apparently organization founder Diane Samples' 2-year-old son was disenchanted after seeing "Lethal Weapon 4" in flight. Now, I saw the movie in question and I must agree that it did contain many exploding people and things, but in the absence of a plot, I just figured Mr. Gibson felt he had to do something.

My questions for Samples are these: Were you aboard the flight in question? If so, did you spring for your kid's headset or did he pay for it out of his allowance? When, as a concerned Connecticut parent, you read the in-flight magazine's entertainment listings, did you consider keeping your toddler occupied during the film with, say, a book, or a game of pinochle? Did you even entertain the time-honored tradition of encouraging your child to annoy the passenger seated behind him, which would have kept his young eyes off the screen and made somebody else miserable at the same time?

One last one: Do you seriously think I'm going to sit still while the skies become littered with endless showings of "Beauty and the Beast"? Not likely, Ms. Samples. Not bloody likely.

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