By the time the crystal ball drops at midnight in Times Square to
signal the end or the beginning, depending on how you look at it,
most of us will be thoroughly millennium'd out.
However, arriving just in time to carry
the spirit of 2000 through the next 12 months are millennium
Insider spotted them in the U.S. Virgin Islands, selling faster
than the locally popular johnnycakes.
Never one to pass on a fad, Insider grabbed a pair, wore them
through customs and immigration in Puerto Rico and elicited an
actual smile from the officials.
The acid test, however, came at the toll booth on the New Jersey
Turnpike the next day.
The glasses drew not only the attention of the usually impassive
attendant but also a cheery seasonal greeting and something almost
resembling a guffaw. Nothing like a little gag to leaven the
anxiety of Y2-you-know-what.
How veddy civil
Wonderful thing, civility. Having confronted "No Fishing" signs
around the world, usually including words like "Absolutely" or
"Don't Even Think About It," we were pleased to come across the
gentle request posted on the pier at Biras Creek Resort on Virgin
Gorda, in the British Virgin Islands.
We'd been hoping
to cast out some spinnerbaits to see what might be biting, but when
asked so politely not to, what was there to do but pack in the rod
and reel and settle for some sunbathing.
How could you not love Port Clinton, Ohio? The little fishing
village on Lake Erie, year after year, mounts its own version of
the timelessly timely Times Square descending New Year's ball with
a 20-foot-long effigy of a walleye.
The walleye, for the
angling-illiterate, is a "large vigorous American freshwater food
and sport fish," according to Webster's -- the salient point being
Walleye are ugly as heck, not only wall-eyed but outfitted with
what seem like far too many spiny fins and flaps. They're also
tasty as heck and fight like banshees when hooked, which makes them
as prized among anglers as steelhead trout and king salmon.
The town is the consensus "walleye capital" of the Great Lakes,
and O! to be in Port Clinton when Capt. Wylie Walleye comes
The Ottawa County Visitors Bureau sent us a press release about
the event, and the release had the niftiest contact info we've ever
seen: "For more information, contact [marketing director] Melinda
Huntley or Mayor Tom Brown." Happy New Year, Mayor Brown, and one